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March 22, 2004
Women Only/Men Only
When someone gets married I don’t know of a club, church, or any organization that would want to break that unity up. As a matter of fact, the church in particular strives to keep marriages together. So here is my question: why have meetings that are only for one sex or the other? Why have meetings that are only for men or only for women? This happens at every church that I know of, so I am not just picking on one. I also know of female comedians or movie stars that have “girl’s night out”. There are clubs that will only let men be members. At most churches there is a club just for women. I just don’t get it.
Our pastor was preaching Sunday morning and he was telling about how men and women just don’t think alike. I’m sure that’s true in some cases. No one is going to see exactly like someone else 100% of the time. I can’t imagine a woman seeing 100% eye to eye with another woman all the time. We’re all different and that’s a good thing. But, is this the reason for having same sex clubs and meetings; because we supposedly see things differently?
I was invited by a friend to a women’s only meeting at church. I have no idea what goes on, but I’m sure they all have a great time. But do I want to go? No, I don’t. I truly have no desire to go to a function that only allows one particular sex. I love being with my husband. We try to do everything possible together. If it were a meeting that the both of us could attend, I would make sure that we went. But why would I want to leave him at home while I went off somewhere else? Things like that just don’t happen in this house. He’s my partner, my rock, and the best friend that I have in this whole world and I want to share everything with him. And guess what?! He would enjoy going with me. He would enjoy a comedian or a hearing a woman talk just as much as I would, so why should he be excluded? We enjoy the same things and feed off of each others reactions which makes whatever we’re doing an even better experience.
Does anyone else feel this way or understand this?
Posted by tami at March 22, 2004 12:21 PM
Comments
I guess you could start some meetings for both partners, or refuse all single sex meetings and tell them why. I just feel that one's religion is so personal that meetings other than services are not 'church' matters.
Posted by: Miss L at March 22, 2004 2:42 PM
Elizabeth, I understand what you are saying. That is basically what I am doing; I am refusing any meetings that are not for both sexes. Like I said, I have no idea exactly what goes on, what is talked about, etc. I guess if I were that curious, I would go, but I’m not. It might just be a Bible study, but then again if it was, why couldn’t the men attend also? I have no idea.
As far as religion being personal: I understand that also. We all interpret things differently, but I have been thinking more and more that we are told to “spread the Word”. I have also been thinking: How am I to do that if I keep it a personal issue? I think I am opening up more about what I believe in. Many posts back, I wrote about the church people coming to visit and how they asked personal questions. I still think that it was very forward of them, but I also now believe that if I truly am a Christian as I say that I am, I shouldn’t be afraid to answer any questions about what I believe in. Actually, I should be telling others before they can ask.
Posted by: Tami at March 22, 2004 3:52 PM
I know what you mean. My wife and I have started and been part of many bible study, prayer, and encouragement groups that have been very enriching for us and all involved. I have led many "men's groups" and talk to many more mixed groups. I always feel like they are missing out on the best stuff if they do not get to meet my wife and hear what she has to say. I really think that on important aspect of religious experience is community. We need all kind of people with all kinds of experiences around us to learn and to grow as God intends for us.
Posted by: rob at March 22, 2004 7:29 PM
Get over it and move on! Groups like this have been around for a hundred years. Both have clubs and if you don't want to go, then don't. It's like a dirty movie, do i want to watch or not ? ( old mean people at the church) don't want us to be with each other, what's wrong with them?????
Posted by: Dennis at March 22, 2004 8:14 PM
l can see both sides of the meeting thing. l think God created men and women with different social makeup. On some issues, men will open up and talk more freely if there are no women present. Pornography is one such issue. Likewise, some women may feel better able to open up about certain issues with other women.. This doesn't mean men and women can't or shouldn't get together in groups, though.
l love my hubby and like him, too. l love spending time with him, just hanging out. But l also am very fulfilled on a different level when l go out with a good girlfriend and talk.
Posted by: gw at March 23, 2004 2:31 AM
And then there are the Muslims...
Posted by: Lynne at March 23, 2004 4:16 AM
Excellent point, Lynne. I meant to point that out; that this is my religion and I’m not trying to speak for all :) I’m sure the Muslims are totally different!
Posted by: Tami at March 23, 2004 7:44 AM