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December 17, 2007
Children
Big families like The Waltons fascinate me. Any TV show with lots of brothers and sisters are always interesting to me. I know they are only TV shows, but I believe they give you a good idea of what it would be like to have that many people in one house. I think about it and it boggles my mind. The show Jon & Kate Plus 8 on TLC is reality TV. Kate has to cook, clean, do dishes, wash clothes, dress, and potty train; all for EIGHT children. She does have help occasionally, but I cannot imagine how exhausted she must be at the end of each day. Then again, when they get a little older, things will be more fun. I love the reality shows like Kids by the Dozen where they have lots of children; some are adults while others are just out of diapers.
I wouldn’t want that many children, but its fun to observe. Growing up, I always wanted a boy and a girl. I wanted to have the boy first because my best friend had a big brother and I thought that was neat, so I always wanted one of my kids to be the big brother. It’s funny that this is exactly how things happened. As you know, I have Andrew who is 18 and Ashley who is 11.
In my mom’s family, it was she and her sister and in my family, I have one sister. My sister and I are four years apart. It’s hard to believe she is 31.
Kevin and I decided many years ago that we didn’t want any more children. Our reasoning was; we didn’t want to start over. We were finished with car seats, diapers, potty training, teaching letters, and so on and we didn’t want to do that again. I’m not saying I don’t want grandchildren or I don’t like watching babies because I do. I’m just saying we don’t want to be responsible 24/7 for a baby again. Grandchildren can be returned ;)
When I was young, I always wanted to be a teacher. As an adult I learned, it didn’t take a classroom to become one. Any mother can tell you that once you have children, you become a full-time teacher. Everything is a learning experience and that doesn’t exclude the mother herself. I have learned many things throughout the years from my children.
I do believe most children are different today than they were when I grew up. The music they hear on the radio is much more explicit; the shows on TV are gorier and have many sexual innuendos. In general, I think children know more about life at a younger age. Even if they avoid the radio and TV shows, the news describes a lot of sad stories and they love to give as much information as possible. They use words like mutilated, rape, and sodomy. Those words alone evoke many images and questions. I don’t remember ever hearing those words when I was growing up.
I think children are naturally good though. I believe they have good, pure hearts and through our mistakes – though they may be accidental - or through the mistakes of others, they can begin to turn sour if the situation is not handled correctly. I believe we are all born with sin, but that sin does not rear its ugly head until a certain age. That age would depend on what the child has been exposed to.
The most amazing thing to me about children is their curiosity and willingness to learn. Naturally, I am not referring to older children. Preschoolers are so much fun to be around though. They love to sing and dance, learn to read and write, play games, and color with pretty crayons. They see things in different ways than we do. It’s a blast when they see something for the first time; their reactions can be very entertaining! For example, I have three beauty marks on my face. As one of my nieces sat in my lap, she pointed and touched each of those beauty marks. As she touched them with furrowed brows, she said, “Aunt Tami, I think you have spots!”
To me, that was priceless.
The most important thing we need to teach our children is about Jesus Christ and that he is our Savior. The only way to heaven is through Him. There is no other way. They need to know that He died on the cross to save us from our sins. They need to experience church. No church is perfect as no people are perfect, but we have to keep our eyes focused on the goal and the goal is Heaven. Everything else is irrelevant.
I am not getting preachy here; at least, I don’t mean to. I let Ashley watch all kinds of things on TV that would make some parents heads roll. She also listens to many colorful songs, but she still knows right from wrong.
My favorite thing to do as a child was play with Barbies. I had the dream house, cottage, a purple Corvette, a yellow van, furniture for every room, clothes, shoes, and lots of Barbies. I was very fortunate to have so much. I also had a room just for my Barbies and it wasn’t small either. I would sit in that room for hours and use my imagination. That was so much fun! As I have said before; I would have no problems playing with Barbies right now and I am 35. I don’t think that is strange though. Adults play Guitar Hero and other games on their systems and computers. Many adults play fantasy games, so I don’t think having the desire to play with Barbies is that bizarre.
Now that I have talked so much about children, I would like to say that I don’t think there is anything wrong with people who don’t have children or who don’t want children. I had a teacher in high school who when asked why she never had children replied, “Because I want to travel."
Now, some people would find that way of thinking selfish, but I don’t. If you don’t really want children, you shouldn’t have them because they are a lifetime commitment. I don’t fault people for that.
Posted by tami at December 17, 2007 9:58 AM
Comments
I read about book about roleplaying games like D&D and it actually compared it to playing barbie.. Which of course offended lots of hte guys. But I thought about how true it is. It is just make believe imagination with a few more rules so that everyone is playing hte same way. so bring on the barbies.
Posted by: ellice at December 18, 2007 5:51 AM
You know, you can play with Barbies online:
http://www.barbiegirls.com/home.html
LOL!!
I also don't fault people that don't want kids. I never thought I'd ever have kids myself..I was never dead set against it, I just never thought I would have any. Having children is the hardest job in the world, with so many responsibilities, both physical and mental. It's also very rewarding and one of the greatest aspects of my life. I honestly don't know who I would be now if I weren't a mommy. If a person thinks that they are not cut out for parenthood or children just don't fit into their lifestyle, I don't see that as selfish either. They are just making the smart choice for their particular situation. It's better to decide not to have children and stick with that than to have them and regret it later.
Posted by: Stacey at December 18, 2007 7:32 AM
Howie and I are in the no kids camp. I never did dream of having children, and the older I got, the less I wanted them. I love my great nieces and nephews, and our best friends' kids, but I'm glad to come home to our quiet house after we spend time with them all! :)
Posted by: Kimberley Broyles at December 18, 2007 10:12 AM